Going through the FJM archives again, I've noticed a couple of surprising things. Of the writers, Murbles is underrated. He keeps things short. I especially like this line in re: punny Manny Ramirez headlines: "Keep this up and you just might earn yourselves a spot on the staff of my high school newspaper." Also, most people, or ME-pole -- See what I did there?*, cite Ken Tremendous as the the site's #1 Most Awesomest contributor, but a quick look at the Mid to Late 2000s in Sports' Criticism Criticism reveals:
Witty Know-It-Allisms per 10 News Stories (WK-I-A/10NS or kiatons)
Ken Tremendous - 38.93 kiatons
Junior - 45.34 kiatons
dak - 28.73 kiatons
Roger Ebert - 32.67 kiatons
Murbles - 36.23 kiatons
Phlip Gatsby - 4.40 kiatons
Scandalous! Of course, kiatons don't factor in emotional appeals (C'mon! I don't have time to look up WEMPLAs!). Junior delights me. My favorite, in re: "Every Hall of Famer did something unique.":
"Yep, every Hall of Famer did something unique. Mike Schmidt played with his hat sideways. Roberto Clemente chewed other people's fingernails. Tris Speaker was Japanese. Lou Boudreau rode a dolphin into the batter's box. Nap Lajoie would only use John Wilkes Booth's dismembered leg as a bat. And he corked it. Johnny Mize was from the future." ... "Catfish Hunter breathed nitrogen. Don Drysdale invented the mandolin."
*I have no idea what I did there either.
**I really am bored.
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I don't think Phlip has 10 news stories. He's really been slacking.
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